Is it common among (female) INTPs to have no natural desire to have children?
This is a feeling I’ve always had, strangely enough. Despite every argument and question from outside and within, such as: “It will come”, “Maybe not right now”, “When the right one comes along…”, “Don’t you like kids?”, “Don’t you want to make a child of your own and teach and watch it grow into a beautiful human being?”, “Having kids is such a life-altering moment unlike anything else”, “Having children is a precious gift one shouldn’t readily discard”, I always zoom right back to my natural, calm yet instinctive reaction to the question of me – not as a woman, not as anybody else – wanting to have children: “No, I simply do not think that is for me. Someone else. Not me.”
I know I’m not alone in this. And why these protesting comments, questions and arguments are quite common to hear regarding such a statement tells us how deeply integrated and inherent the topic of having children is within our society. Well, naturally; procreation is the most essential source of life. Most of all, the topic becomes (more than) heated when women are stating they do not want to have children. I don’t think I even have to explain why. Of course it is women. The power of the evolutional, cultural, and traditional codes and values divided among the sexes since the very beginning of man are not lost on me. And they are not easily releashed. Even when we accept the women’s choices, we still naturally ask why. The women do it themselves at one point or another (society sure will keep reminding them), despite the choice came naturally to them. Yet, it is utterly barmy that any of us need to (keep) question such a choice when men receive none of the same scrutiny. Despite how long we’ve come, women’s bodies still belong to society in sooo many ways. Or society, at least, feels a right to meddle – with anything remotely feminine or queer really, for some reason. *sighs* But I digress.